When I started this blog I had very little idea about…
a) what I would write
b) who would read it
c) where it would eventually lead me
Weirdly enough a) and b) seem to be working themselves out on their own, which has given me faith that if I don’t worry too much about c) it will do the same .
But one of the very few things I WAS sure about was that I wanted to maintain a certain amount of “propriety” , for want of a better word, when talking about my family, friends or colleagues.
I realise that this is a term rarely heard outside of Jane Austen novels but I’ll try to explain.
It’s not about privacy – because god knows if anyone was interested enough I’m sure they could even find out what colour undies I wear (to save you the trouble I favour black, sturdily designed ones from Target. Apart from a few cheeky little numbers I… never mind)!
It’s more about being aware that when I write about a person in my life I need to consider both their feelings and any potential IRL (in real life) consequences that may result. I don’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings, embarass anyone or accidentally drop them in the shit.
This propriety is even more important when it comes to my family – and in particular my partner Brook. So far he has only appeared in my second ever post as the hero who braves the wilds of Dan Murphy’s the night before Christmas to ensure we have booze for the festive season.
To be honest I didn’t really think he’d be interested in appearing further – in fact I thought he’d be grateful if I DIDN’T mention him any further.
But then there he started to ask some subtle questions.
For example after a I’d written my first Mind the Gap post…
Brook: I’m not in this this one either.
Me: *surprised* No you’re not.
Brook: Why haven’t you mentioned me?
Me: Well… because it’s a conversation between me and Oscar (our second child). You weren’t there when it happened.
I sensed a faint disappointment but it still didn’t really register. Then I finally got around to doing my About page…
Brook: *indignant* I’m not in this one either!
Me: *patiently* No, that’s because it’s about ME.
Brook: But I’m your partner! How will people ever know that if you don’t mention me?
And then, finally, I got it. He didn’t care about any of that “don’t give too much away” crap that I’d been worrying about.
To him it was straightforward – he just wanted every single person in the big wide world of the internet to know he was my man.
Because he loves me. Because he’s proud of me. And also, I have a sneaking suscpicion, because he thinks that being on my blog may one day make him a famous on the internet.
God love him…
These three reasons alone are enough to make him a man in a million. But because he’s so awesome I’m going to share 5 more of them with you here.
WARNING: Anyone who doesn’t like soppy stuff should either bail now or grab a sick bag and hold on tight!
1. He’s a spunk.
Everyone has their one criteria for what makes a man (or woman for that matter) a spunk. Brook is totally my defnintion of a spunk because he embodies all my key criteria which are noted in the highly scientific diagram below…
2. He’s great at what he does
There are some people out there who would thnk I’ve got it made becuase my partner is a chef. Yes he can do all the fancy stuff – he’s worked in some high end places here in Brisbane so he knows his fromage from his foie gras. I’ve had some divine birthday and anniversay dinners – once he even made me my very own croquembuche for a birthday cake!
The flipside is that the hours suck balls – he works nights and weekends which means I do a lot of solo parenting. I guess you can’t have everything otherwise there’d be nothing to moan about.
But what I love most about it is his passion. When he’s in the kitchen he’s totally in command – calm and focused and utterly in control. Even after knowing him for 12 years his knowledge and skill still impress me to this day. And believe me there’s nothing sexier than seeing someone you love do something extremely well!
3. He’s an awesome father
As well as our three sons, Brook also has a son and daughter from a previous marriage. He ADORES them all and what’s more he makes a consistent effort to spend time with each of them so that they can talk about the special things that are important to them.
When he listens to them he REALLY listens – as in he stops what he’s doing and gives them his unreserved attention. There is no easier and more effective way to make a child feel special and loved and all of them, from the 5 year old to the 17 year old, soak it up like sponges!
Brook also loves babies – I mean really loves them. Basically if it’s small and squishy with big wide eyes he goes from big tough chef to babbling baby-talker in seconds. A total sucker.
A few years ago we had to make the decision about whether we were going to have any more children. Here’s how it went…
4. He’s the Yin to my Yang
Right, I’m going to admit something here that may shock you deeply so I hope you’re ready…
I’m not always easy to live with.
I know, right? Difficult to believe but it’s true. It’s not because I’m a stroppy cow or because I have a nasty problem with wind.
What I can be though, is a little manic at times. Sometimes I get so caught up in all the “THINGS” that need to be done I lose my sense of perspective.
And I’ll be honest… sometimes I just lose my shit! On those rare occasions I can seem a little “bat-shit crazy”, complete with miniature devil horns sprouting from the to of my head.
Brook on the other hand has a naturally more laid back attitude which acts as a balance to my “do 3,000 things at once” approach. This can be frustrating at times – if the boys ask him if they can eat BBQ Shapes at breakfast time there is a possibility he may actually let them.
But he’s also fantastic at helping me restore perspective on those occasions when everything get’s too much, as I’ve illustrated below…
5. He leads the cheer squad
In anything I do, whether it’s work, parenting or even just keeping the house together, I know that he’s behind me 100%. He encourages me when things aren’t going well and if I succeed he’s there leading the cheer squad and saying to people “Isn’t she great?”.
Knowing he’s got my back in any situation is possibly the greatest feeling in the world. It give me the security, confidence and support to follow my dreams and I would be lost without it.
And finally a note to the man himself…
Babe, this post is my way of saying thank you. For everything you are and everything you do.
And most importantly… for being MY man in a million 🙂